More on Commitment Free Passes

 By Nina Atwood

You give out free passes on commitment when you buy into others’ stories of hardship and loss. Empathizing and sympathizing, you may figure that all you have to do is love them enough and they will come around. But did you stop to think about your own losses and how they’ve impacted you? You have loved and lost as well, yet that doesn’t stop you from wanting and being willing to give a commitment to someone new.

The only cure for loss and pain in the past is to create love and connection in the present. That doesn’t mean you dive into the first warm bed you can find. It means that your heart heals by loving someone new, not by hanging back and avoiding commitment. So if you give someone a free pass on commitment, you in effect stand in the way of that person’s healing.

By stating clearly your intention to be in a loving, committed relationship, you invite another intentional person into your life. The healing starts with that basic stance, and someone who is not yet ready to heal will step aside. That’s your cue to whisper “NEXT” and keep looking.

Entry Filed under: Relationships



 

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