Second Time Around [Love Strategies Podcast]

Why do we choose the people that we do? Sure, there’s physical attraction, but it turns out there are other factors at play when we act the crazy way we do in the name of love. Politics and religion have more to do with it than you may realize, even if you don’t talk about it! Find out all the fascinating science behind love and mate selection. Also in this Love Strategies show, find out what you need to know to make it more likely that love the second time around can actually work. Divorce and remarriage isn’t so easy, […]

Continue Reading

Sexting, Cheating, and Real Monogamy [Love Strategies Podcast]

Remember the bizarre meltdown of Congressman Weiner? The story is old but it ties into the debate about monogamy: What is happening to monogamy? If you pay attention to the media, you might begin to conclude that is is an antiquated notion that no longer applies to today’s modern relationships. In this podcast, Nina tackles the issue of monogamy: why it is so important and what it has to do with today’s relationships. Also: is sexting cheating? Are emails of a sexual nature to someone outside of your relationship a sign that you’re cheating? Nina covers all these issues and […]

Continue Reading

Obstacles and Dreams [Love Strategies Podcast]

What are your dreams for your life? Do you believe you can make them happen, or have you given up? More importantly, what is in the way of you achieving your dreams? In this enlightening podcast, Nina talks about the power of dreams: defining them, overcoming obstacles, and believing in them. If you are willing to take a few risks, you may want to challenge yourself to a.) define your dreams, and b.) understand how you may be sabotaging yourself on the road to achieving them. Also, find out how dreams can be the fuel for your life, and what […]

Continue Reading

Miserable and Parents: Should We Divorce?

Dear Nina: My wife and I have been married for 12 years and have two children – a 9-year-old boy and 7-year-old girl. We have a difficult, unhappy marriage. There’s no outward fighting or drama, and our young children may not know there’s a problem. But my wife and I rarely have meaningful talks or display affection. We’ve become essentially roommates. We would like to divorce but are worried about the impact on our young kids. Our marriage isn’t completely intolerable. So should we stay together for the kids’ benefit? Or should we consider our own (selfish?) desires and divorce? […]

Continue Reading

Stayover Relationships and Toddler Love [Love Strategies Podcast]

New studies highlight a so-called new trend: Stayover Relationships. The question raised by these studies is this: “Do stayover relationships interfere with the path to marriage?” But is this really a new trend, and does it really impact the decision to marry? Couples have been “staying over” for decades – meaning that they maintain separate homes but spend three or more nights per week at one place or the other. Find out from Nina why staying over might not be a bad idea, and also what to watch out for if your relationship follows this trend. Also in this podcast, […]

Continue Reading

Love at First Sight: Real? Yes. Smart? No.

“Love at first sight” is a well-known expression, but how real is it? I’ve heard many couples over the years refer to how quickly they fell in love. Some say it was instantaneous, others say it took weeks or months. You have probably heard more than one friend say “it was love at first sight”! The latest research tells us that it is possible to fall in love in as little as a fraction of a second. But the reality is that it doesn’t always lead to lasting love. One study, conducted by Syracuse University Professor Stephanie Ortigue, revealed that up to twelve areas […]

Continue Reading 1 comment

Love at First Sight [Love Strategies Podcast]

“Love at first sight” is a familiar notion, but is it real? More importantly, can it last? Now, new research answers the question of whether or not those couples who instantly fall madly in love make it over the long haul. What causes instantaneous love? Is it real love? Why is it so difficult for crazy in love couples to take their time before marrying? In this podcast, Nina answers all those questions and more. Also in this podcast: how to effectively deal with the lying about age, height, and weight that you may encounter in the online dating world. Also, living together and money: […]

Continue Reading

Your Girlfriend Is Right: You Should Get Married

Is your girlfriend pressuring you to get married? Maybe it’s time to listen because she’s right – getting married is good for you! Everyday Health reports the latest research on men’s health and the findings are in – men are healthier along every major dimension when they marry. From sex to cancer to heart problems, married men fare better. Married service men have lower rates of PTSD. Married men live longer, behave better, and drink less. For the full run-down, read the article in Everyday Health: “7 Ways Marriage Helps Men’s Health.” Of course, the obvious caveat is that when […]

Continue Reading

Date Like The Bacheolor [Love Strategies Podcast]

Despite the reality show staged scenarios, there are some nuggets of wisdom to be found in “The Bachelor,” ABC’s long running series that features one very handome guy dating about fifteen women at one time. Over the course of the season he gradually eliminates them until he has one woman to whom he proposes in a romantic scene complete with fabulous diamond ring. In real life, guys don’t date that way, but they could, at least to some degree. Looking at the Bachelor, a smart guy can take a few cues that will help him date more successfully. Find out what to […]

Continue Reading 1 comment

She’s Doing Threesomes While He’s Just Lonesome

Dear Nina: Should I be tolerant when it comes to a girlfriend hanging out with ex lovers? They are not people she dated, but people she has slept with. Recently, she blew me off for a “friend” coming into town, and I found out the “friend” was someone she had a threesome with, and the friend was spending the night at her apartment. She was not upfront or honest about it. She had other recent ex- lovers she wanted to hang out with, too. I broke it off, because I’m not cool with it. I said she should give these […]

Continue Reading 3 comments

When Should You Introduce Your Children to Someone New?

When a single dad is dating, how long should he wait before meeting the woman’s children and vice versa? And how should the father describe the relationship with the woman before the kids meet her? It depends. The timing varies depending on the age of the children and the circumstances of the Dad’s single life. Most children fantasize that their divorced parents will reunite. Meeting someone new crushes that hope, and that can be difficult for them. There are no hard and fast rules about the timing of introducing someone new to your children. What’s important is to consider all […]

Continue Reading

Does Texting Ruin Relationships?

Recently a journalist called and wanted to discuss the impact of texting on relationships – not the first time I have been asked that question. It’s highly relevant given the prevalence of social medial and how it’s used. Here are the questions asked and my answers: Do you think that texting creates insecurity and misunderstanding in a relationship? And does it give a man more power? Texting is just a tool, and like any other tool, it can be used constructively or destructively. If you have an issue in your relationship, texting is not the avenue to solve it. Face-to-face interaction is better […]

Continue Reading 5 comments

Three Reasons the Holidays Can Be Tough for Singles

…And What to Do About It Fourteen years ago, the holidays came around but I was not in a festive mood. Everywhere I looked, there were constant reminders of what was supposed to be happening in my life: happy couples strolling along in the mall, television commercials featuring the guy giving the girl a gorgeous diamond ring, not to mention those holiday songs of love. I was divorced, had broken up with my latest boyfriend, and what I wanted most for Christmas was for it to be over, already. I know firsthand what it feels like to feel left out, and […]

Continue Reading 3 comments

Internet Dating Part One [Love Strategies Podcast]

Did you know that you have one of the most powerful tools ever created at your fingertips – one that could literally have you happily in love in sixty to ninety days? It’s a little thing called THE INTERNET, and INTERNET DATING is now a 650 million dollar business. As I’m writing this, thousands of couples are deciding to marrying, and they MET ON THE INTERNET! If you don’t know someone who is happily married who met their soul mate on the internet, you will. I personally know half a dozen happily married couples in my friendship circles who met […]

Continue Reading 1 comment

She’s Hot: Be Careful What You Say!

Dear Nina: I met a really attractive and intelligent woman at a party a few weeks ago. It was a public event at an art gallery. She seemed very educated and sophisticated; we’re both in our late 20s. We had been talking for about a half hour and really seemed to develop a great rapport. We had even made tentative plans to meet for coffee sometime. Then, things suddenly went downhill. There was a pause in the conversation and I commented that she had a really nice, hourglass figureť. I thought she would take it as a compliment but instead she became deeply offended. She said, […]

Continue Reading 3 comments

Divorce Stigma: Are You Marrying Material?

When I was growing up, we were the only family in school that we knew about whose parents were divorced. It made us feel odd and different from others, stigmatized. Turns out we weren’t alone – many people from divorce felt that way growing up in the nineteen fifites and sixites. Now, being from a divorced family isn’t unusual, but you may find that you are stigmatized in today’s dating world. Studies tell us that if you grew up in a family of divorce, you’re more likely to be divorced. The reasons for that are not clear. Lack of stability in family […]

Continue Reading 2 comments

What Direction is Your Inner Compass Pointed?

Some situations in life you cannot control, but during those that you can, self-inflicted situations we’ll call them, how do you handle yourself? Do you listen to your inner compass? Our bodies can pick up emotional energy from other people, and the whole field of emotional intelligence has shown us that there’s a reason that we have a feeling known as intuition- knowing what kind of situations and people are good or bad for us. So as you move through life, listen to that instinct. Some people ask me why it’s so important to not drink alcohol on the first […]

Continue Reading 1 comment

Facebook Friend or Foe?

Do you ever meet someone and then friend them on facebook? “Friending” has become the new text, which replaced the phone call- the first step after meeting someone. Whether you friend colleagues, new friends, old friends, potential love interests or your relatives, “friending” is a now a definitive step in any relationship. After that first date, do you rush home to see how long it takes a guy or girl to “friend” you? Well, now that facebook has connected some 500 million people, researchers are discovering what makes people decide to disconnect. A study by the University of Colorado Denver […]

Continue Reading 1 comment

The On-Again, Off-Again Path to a Great Relationship

What do you get caught in that pulls you off the path of a great relationship? Do you date men who are high risk? Men who take you on a roller coaster ride that ends in heartbreak? How do you determine a guy’s character? Do you have a well-defined picture of what you’re looking for in a relationship? Are you committed to your vision? You have to figure out what your vision is and stay true to that. I want you to sidestep settle-for relationships and eventually avoid them altogether. Don’t waste your time on dates and men who are […]

Continue Reading

Self-Esteem is Part of Any Relationship

Maggie and Jake met through friends and hit it off big-time. For the first few months, anyway. Then Maggie noticed something new creep into their interactions. If they had any confict at all, Jake went into critical overdrive. “I can always find someone better to date,” he would say, lashing out in anger. He criticized her, verbally putting her down. Later, he would feel remorseful, apologizing and promising never to do it again. But, of course, he did do it again. And again. Maggie took a step back and asked herself, “Why would I put up with this?” She talked to […]

Continue Reading 2 comments

When a Man Loves a Woman…He Acts Like it

Fox news reported that Lance Armstrong broke up with Kate Hudson because she was “too needy.” If the report is true – and who knows since the source is an associate at his foundation and not the man himself - let’s look at what it really means.Men don’t break up over neediness. That’s right – even though that is an often cited reason for leaving a woman, the reality is that when a guy says she was too needy, he’s using that as code for something else that he doesn’t know how to define. The truth is that she succumbed to the […]

Continue Reading 2 comments

Out With the Bad, in With the Good

Michael asked if he and his girlfriend have a chance at a healthy love and a life of accomplishment of goals. With multiple addictions between them, and a family history of addictions on both sides, they have many challenges. Here’s my message to them. Michael: first of all, I want to acknowledge you for sharing your story and for having the self-insight to be concerned about your future (and your future children’s lives). The first step in any process of recovery and growth is, as you know, awareness, and then declaring the truth of your situation. Second, the most useful way to view […]

Continue Reading

It’s All in the Family…or is it? Make Sure Everyone’s on the Same Page

Dear Nina: I’m in a three year relationship. The hours that we work differ greatly and as a result, we do not get to spend the time together that I would like. My daughter seems to want to love her, but when I ask her to go and spend time as a family, there are an abundance of excuses. Even watching TV she will sit away from us and then claims that I push her away when my daughter is there. I just don’t understand what else I can do other than continue to ask her to join us. I […]

Continue Reading

“The Subtext of that Text is Bootay”-Carrie Bradshaw

Dear Nina, I recently met a man through an internet dating site, we have been on a couple of dates and had a lovely time. The odd thing is that he only texts me between dates (no calls) and he had to cancel our third date due to a hectic day at work, and as yet has not rescheduled (it was a week ago today we were meant to meet). He texts every day and the texts are very flattering and flirty, and are starting to get quite cheeky- although I keep batting back with ones to suggest he may […]

Continue Reading

Put the “Break” in Break-Up

“I choose to reclaim my sense of personal power.” Great! That’s a wonderful first step for you post break-up. Now you need specific actions and behaviors in order to maintain your personal power. I’ll start with a list of “don’ts”: Don’t call your Ex unless you have a specific purpose such as arranging to return belongings; in that case, keep it short and sweet When you feel the pain and resentment rise up, do not call your Ex while you are feeling that way; instead, take a few minutes to “download” – write your thoughts and feelings in the form […]

Continue Reading

Next Posts Previous Posts


 

Search Singles Blog

Posts by Category