The Proper Ingredients Make for a Healthy Marriage

 By Nina Atwood

In a recent Time Magazine article, the report from decades of research is that marriage helps both men and women live longer and healthier. But if you read the full story, you find that for women the caveat is this: the marriage must be good for her in order for her to experience the health benefits. The biggest factor? How much your relationship causes your brain to trigger the release of the stress hormone cortisol.

During conflict, our brains automatically interpret that we are in danger, and it doesn’t distinguish between actual physical danger and a social threat. That sends the body into emergency mode, and too much of that causes our bodies to gradually fall apart.

Conflict is inevitable in marriage; even the happiest of couples fight to some degree. But the difference is this: do you fight over the little things that annoy you, or do you fight over fundamental differences in values and lifestyle? The latter kind of conflict cannot be resolved. If you choose to marry someone who is not aligned with you about the fundamentals of life, your marriage is doomed to endless conflict and the resulting stress, which we now know means health issues. The research shows that this effect is particularly powerful in women.

As a woman, one of the most important decisions you will ever make is your choice of life partner. Make a poor one, and the consequences can be devastating, for weeks, months, and years, especially if you have a child with the wrong person. Make a good one, and you have the foundation for a lifetime of happiness. Now we know that making a good choice also means better health and longevity.

If you haven’t done so already, buy and read Temptations of the Single Girl. I promise it will guide you to make the right choice!

Entry Filed under: Dating

1 Comment

  • 1. Relationship Building  |  January 16th, 2012 at 6:04 pm

    Thank you for the added insight into this statistic. We often hear statistics pushed around in the news, but we rarely look into the research. I also appreciated the comment about the importance of sharing fundamental values. Very important in building lasting relationships.



 

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